Been a while

Been a while since I've done anything like this. Its something I turn to when I'm feeling depressed or really down. Its almost like a ritual.

Happy > Really Happy > Down and out > Depression > Start blog

I mean the fuck is wrong with me.

Anyway last time it was about a girl, this time it was about a great friend of mine. Met this friend during NS, served almost the entirety of my two years with this buddy by my side. We'd go down for breaks together, eat together, go out for dinner together, play games together. Heck we hung out on weekends so frequently and after work so often that people started to take notice that if I wasn't going home straight, it would be out with this guy or if he wasn't around, I'd be meeting him anyway.

Pratically inseparable in camp and outside, we even played the same online game together. It was the perfect 'bromance' so you can say. But as they say, all good things come to an end, and even the best of friendships can have a tumultuous ending.

Long story short, he got sick of my depressive behaviour going through relapse and I was sick of his inability to empathise. We'd make a plan and he'd cancel last minute and when I called him out on it he'd try to justify it about like how I deserved it. I would just be emotionally depressive and pretty much a bummer to be with.

So as it stands I finally met up with him after a huge blowout on his last day at work. Smoothed things over, made sure we understood what was going on, and decided to part ways, because this shit wasn't gonna work at all. I would work on my depression, and he'd, well, I really don't know. There's no hard feelings towards him at this point, I dunno if its the same with him. Damn though, this is the hardest thing I've ever had to do and that's topping conquering myself a year ago.

Usually with friends you just phase out and make new ones, never forgetting the ones that crossed your path and made a difference, but this, I really thought we were friends forever. I kept on clinging and clinging to what was obviously a deteriorating relationship. I guess its for the best for me and him.

I sincerely wish him all the best in school and life and whatever happens. I've deleted every contact I have of him, MSN, phone, every conversation log I've had and even in-game. I don't see what good that is because I have his e-mail, phone number, address, IC number and shit memorised anyway, but I guess it makes it harder for me to just text to say I miss him and I want to be friends again if I have to key in 8 numbers instead of finding him on my phone.

Just typing this out makes me so fucking sad I want to cry, letting go of people I care about and love is so fucking difficult. It hit me, hard, that all I have left of this friendship are the memories that I will never be able to experience again, and short of dementia, which I will never forget.

So thank you for serving NS with me, making it the most bearable as possible, I will now have to finish the next 7 weeks without your company and I really hate it now. If fate will have it we cross paths again some time in the future, I hope you still remember me, as I will you. Maybe then things will be different.

See you bro, love you. See you when I see you.

Music

I've been immersed in my music these two days, been doing nothing but plugging in my ear phoens and living in my own little bubble. Its great.

I recently discovered some unreleased tracks and demos from Paramore, and some bonus tracks I never knew about. My favourites are Decoy and the older version of Hallelujah. Notable mentions are Temporary and Stay Away. Great songs!

I also got back into my metal craze, after watching a video about bodybuilding, they used a song from KoRn, named Blind. One thing led to another and I was watching youtube videos of Slipknot and all the bands I used to listen to.

I realised that Corey Taylor is actually pretty fucking good looking rofl, and he seems like a relaxed, nice kind of guy you'd chill out with and have some beers with. I used to be afraid of Slipknot members but now after knowing how Corey Taylor really is, it changes my entire perspective.



Corey Taylor



LOLWUT COREY TAYLOR?


Hahaha fucking ace man, surprising how people are different when they're off stage.


LISTEN TO SLIPKNOT AND PARAMORE EVERYONE.

School

Man, so far school's been great, I've been good, I only skipped one lesson which was WT on Monday. I've been trying to come to school early as much as I can. Haha, can't believe it actually, but I kinda look forward to school cos T01's a great class la. We have idiots like Sherwin who can sometimes go overboard but he's damn fun to be around with la.

Then there's Nick who's always on for anything one, and goes gym with me almost every day. Sometimes I feel bad for taking the mickey on him all the time, I try to cut down suaning you okay faggot. JQ who's also damn on for gym but other than that sibeh pang seh. Adi who's always pessimistic about me, and a lways thinks about me in a negative fashion lol! But still great guy, my indo pal okay! JJ who's uber pro in DotA, and also damn on for anything EXCEPT gym rofl!!!!

Last but not least we have the only Malay in our class, IBRAHIM! Lolfun guy la actually, sometimes annoyed at his ps ways but he's pretty cool and nice.

Haha I sound damn girly la, but its been a while since I've been in a clique I can talk with and can communicate with, not to mention drink and go out all the time. For the past year or so I've been drifting around different groups of peopple, never really mixing in, one of the cons of knowing too many people I guess.

Omg, have I gone soft?


LOL NOODLES DONE TIME TO EAT YO.

NOTHING TO WRITE

I logged in with the intent of writing something.



THEN I FORGOT EVERYTHING I WANTED TO TYPE GG LOL TIME TO DOTA.

First day of school

What a drag the first day of school was. First lesson was WT and as soon as I entered the classroom, I got a mouthful from Franky Teng just cos I asked "Is this our classroom?", since the classroom was dark and I couldn't recognize anyone and was just making sure.

Then he mistook me for Ibra and wanted to give me B instead of the A+ I deserve cos he's old and forgetful and thought I didn't do any work for the assignment, which I did almost 80% of cos JQ screwed it up lol!!!(JK JQ I know we all tried, cept June)

Yeah, so far I haven't failed any tests which is a godsend because I didn't have a proper conducive place to study and its a lot better than what I've been getting through out my poly years lol! After lesson we went to gym. We as in Sherwin JQ Nick Adi Kian and me. Adi went through the orientation while we all did our stuff.

It was a good feeling to work out together as a class and friends, really feel as if we're all cheering each other on to better ourselves, especially for the upcoming NAPFA. Adi really wants to keep fit and pass his NAPFA, good on him!

Afterward I left them to go for my DWA class, where I just slept all the way through, I felt a bit bad cos my lecturer is super ownage la, one of the best lecturers I've had since Patrice, but I feel like I let him down and that I'm an asshole for not doing as well as I would've liked for his class and as well as sleeping.

NO WORRIES I BUCK UP, AFTER SEEING I GOT B+ FOR WT AFTER HE KP ME THAT I CANNOT PASS, I HAVE THE MOTIVATION.

GG TESTS. And I love T01.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TAN JIN QUAN

HAPPY 19th BIRTHDAY TAN JIN QUAN


Ah it was a great night, partying, drinking, talking nonsense. The day started as usual, with me being late for meeting Nick and GR for gym lol. We then drove over to Hougang Mall to have our
lunch. Some ownage Nasi Lemak from Qi Si or something like that. Nick drove GR home to change and shower and I went to Nicks house to wait for him to change and shower. We then headed to Harbourfront to meet JQ and Adi.

Walked around for a while, looked at scenery at Vivo, the ships and sentosa etc. Ate Burger King for dinner, talked a lot more then we camped at the top floor to enjoy the sea breeze and talk nonsense while waiting for Sylvia to arrive. I a bit hum ji la cos I dunno Sylvia at all but it turns out she's a damn ownage person, super cool. We went to meet Eric, GRs friend to join us to go Boat Quay. Me Sylvia and Nick then snuck off to buy a small gift for JQ.

We surprised him at the MRT and humiliated the hell out of him by singing him a bday song loudly in the MRT station lar, then presented him with the "gift" of a Sundae Pie! From there we boarded the train to Clarke Quay then trotted along to Boat Quay.

The fun begins at Boat Quay where we headed to a bar where Eric was friendly with the management. Opened 2 Martells and 1 Chivas. Almost everyone got smashed and wasted, GR was the worst, running around like an idiot, dropping his glass and breaking it etc etc.

In order of most wasted

1.GR
2.Me
3.Andrew(JJ LIN)
4.Adi
5.JQ
6.Eric
7.Nick
8.Sylvia(Not even drunk one bit, lol!)

Spent the night there until like 4 AM and everyone went home cept me Adi and Nick. We stayed and waited for the first bus which would be cheaper anyway. Talked a lot of nonsense, slacked at Clarke Quay there, talked about lots of issues including girls, drinking, school, boredom issues etc.

Reached home, had a small argument, and slept until 6.

AWESOME.

Eating our dins at BK

Still at BK

GR and NIck at Vivo

HE'S NOT WASTED YET

GETTING THERE

JQ omg u cheating on me??

GR Sylvia

Nick wat u staring at.


Andrew JQ(Anyone think he looks like JJ LIN)

SUP!

Bottoms up!

Group Photo

Group with Lobster Eric.

T-UP. Nick wear a longer shirt u sick fuck.

Best mates!

Best mates!

Lol Deja Vu

Best mates!

SUP

Addicted

Addicted to two songs atm. Leavin' by Jesse McCartney and Alive(N' Outta Control) by Papa Roach. Ownage songs imo.

Anyway today went out gym with Nick and GR, WHO ELSE lol! The rain was pouring like np, and Nick bullshitted and said we were supposed to meet at 2, when the SMS CLEARLY says "230?". Retard faggot! I reached there at 3:30 anyway rofl!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

We talked nonsense, did our workout, and GR mentioned "Eh tomorrow you doing what?" I said I had nothing on and suddenly we had plans tomorrow! Lol! I love people like this, very on one. Anyway our plan was to go Nick's house, AGAIN, to just CHILL yo. Damn fun la can't wait for that.

Then later I went to meet Boon at SLS, with WY as usual pang sehing without giving notice and lying about not being able to pick up the phone later(AT LEAST TURN OFF YOUR PHONE TO MAKE THE LIE SEEM VIABLE, DONT LET US CALL YOU, GET A DIAL TONE, THEN SAY YOUR PHONE NO BATTERY, SUCK DICK!) Talked nonsense, went BK to eat their Sundae pie!

After that we went to play LAN, played a 2 v 2 top bot. Lost badly cos they had a viper at bot lane and Boon's PotM kept feeding him. Viper's fucking cheap in 1 v 1 anyway. Waited for bus for around 30 mins, damn boring, just staring at hot chicks around! Hahaha rofl, I should find a gf soon, damn bored sometimes alone. Miss having company.